'I think I’m in my sod-it era' - Sophie Ellis-Bextor talks normalising menopause, and the power of caring less

Sophie Ellis-Bextor is at a pivotal time in her life. Her career is having a post-Covid resurgence, she has a brand new album coming out, and she hosts a successful podcast - and she's doing all of this while careering towards menopause.

But in the way you'd expect from the queen of pop and icon of the catchy tune, she's totally taking it all in her stride, and it's probably because she's made the decision to care less as she ages.

Her approach to midlife is summed up by the tongue-in-cheek title of her all-new album, Perimenopop. Sophie and her friend and song co-writer, Hannah Robinson, jokingly coined the name.

“We’re a similar age,” she told the Guardian, adding, “So we were jokingly saying: oh, it’s perimenopop. And we thought it was hilarious. It just didn’t leave my head."

For anyone who wonders why she still went ahead and used the name that began as a joke, Sophie has a ready retort: "I think I’m in my sod-it era, really. What’s the point of tiptoeing around?"

Now aged 46, Sophie began planning a return to pop legend status in 2021, after Covid, and possibly motherhood put a speedbump in her career path. Having a career revival while approaching menopause, she's glad the conversation about it has become more mainstream.

Having at one time thought she'd only have her mother to talk to about menopause issues, she appreciates being able to drop the subject into any conversation nowadays.

"I do feel so grateful to all of the women who have made it more of a conversation,” she says. Sophie adds, "I was working with someone the other day, just met her, and she was like, ‘Oh, I’m having a hot flush – perimenopause.'"

"Now, there’s much more transparency. Thank goodness. There’s just so much less mystery, and more help for people who need it," she asserts.

Although she hasn't fully entered the menopause process, Sophie feels she could be "in the first room" of it, so very early perimenopause, perhaps.

Having been a professional musician since she was 16 and with this year marking 30 years since her first gig, not only is Sophie a pro in her industry, she's learned to care a lot less as she gets older.

At 42, she wrote her autobiography, Spinning Plates, which is also the name of her podcast. At the time, the singer suggested she was happier at 42 than she had ever been before.

When asked if anything had changed now she's 46, Sophie says candidly, "same, same. That’s nice!” She adds, "I’m very content with what I have in my life. It’s exciting when you have the twists in the road and new experiences. But I am also very aware of how good I have it."

The star met her husband, Richard Jones, when they were both 22.

They'd only been together a matter of weeks before Sophie fell pregnant, information that was leaked when the singer became a victim of phone hacking - a topic currently covered in ITV drama, The Hack.

The couple now have five children together, all boys, aged between 21 and six years old. Another perk to growing older is how her attitude to work and motherhood has changed for the better.

"I used to be very apologetic about work. I’d make it tiny," says, explaining that she'd "diminish" her work and make out she'd rather be at home, when in reality she loved both her job and her children.

Lockdowns really brought home how much she needs to perform and be a performer, and a shift in how she presents this to her children. "I say to the kids, ‘This matters to me. I like what I do. Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon. But I’ve worked really hard to get these opportunities' – that kind of thing. So I think I frame it better," she concludes.