Queen Elizabeth 'understood and honoured' this harsh reality about being monarch - now King Charles faces same compromise

According to royal expert Emily Andrews, the Queen felt that duty should outweigh 'sentiment' in her role

A composite of a roundel of Queen Elizabeth at Windsor Castle on June 13, 2020 and a picture of King Charles at the 2026 Commonwealth Games
(Image credit: Photo by Toby Melville - WPA Pool/Getty Images // Photo by Oli SCARFF / AFP via Getty Images)

Being monarch grants you a lot of privileges, but also puts you in a position where you have to make some difficult choices between duty and family. The late Queen Elizabeth knew this better than anyone and according to Woman’s royal editor, Emily Andrews, she committed to what many would view as a harsh reality.

Emily recently reflected on Prince Harry and Meghan's recent reunion with the King and revealed what she believes the monarch's main priority should always be.

"Charles' first duty is not to the spare. It is to the heir and his wife," she claimed in the magazine. "That is the deal Queen Elizabeth II understood and honoured for 70 years. The institution comes first, sentiment a distant second."

King Charles, Prince William, Catherine, Princess of Wales, Princess Charlotte, Prince George and Prince Louis watch an RAF flypast from the balcony of Buckingham Palace on June 13, 2026

(Image credit: Photo by Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images)

Elizabeth II: In Private. In Public. The Inside Story by Robert Hardman | £10.50 (was £22) at Amazon

Elizabeth II: In Private. In Public. The Inside Story by Robert Hardman | £10.50 (was £22) at Amazon

This biography was meticulously researched and Hardman is the only biographer to have interviewed all the senior members of the Royal Family. He paints a portrait of a complex woman who was pulled in multiple directions.

Since stepping back as working royals, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex haven't shied away from sharing their thoughts about The Firm. From their Harry & Meghan Netflix series to the Oprah Winfrey interview and Harry's memoir, their revelations and allegations have often put the monarchy in the spotlight for all the wrong reasons.

According to Emily, the things that have been said "must still be painful" for the Prince and Princess of Wales. She wrote, "I understand that William believes the couple should not have been rewarded with a family meeting, however private, with the King."

King Charles and Queen Camilla met with Harry, Meghan, Archie and Lilibet at Highgrove and although it was a family occasion, he's monarch 24/7 and his decisions will inevitably influence how the Royal Family is viewed by the public. The late Queen was firm about trying to separate love for her family from what made sense for the monarchy.

Queen Elizabeth II, Meghan, Duchess of Sussex and Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex watch a flypast to mark the centenary of the Royal Air Force

(Image credit: Photo by Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images)

Despite Harry apparently hoping for a half-in, half-out role, Her Majesty didn’t sign off on this. She made it clear publicly that the Sussexes would no longer carry out engagements on her behalf, though still treasured them as "much loved members of [her] family".

Queen Elizabeth later also stepped in after the Oprah Winfrey interview aired, releasing her "recollections may vary" statement. Her Majesty had to be able to separate the personal from the professional as much as possible and we also saw her do this with King Charles himself.

When he was a child she went on a tour that lasted almost six months and for most of it, he and Princess Anne didn't see their parents. Although it was likely hard for her as a mother to be away so long, duty called and she answered.

Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip on the bridge of the liner Gothic during the Royal Tour of the Commonwealth. 30th November 1953

(Image credit: Photo by NCJ - Kemsley/NCJ Archive/Mirrorpix via Getty Images)

Years later when King Charles got married to Queen Camilla, she didn't attend the wedding ceremony, only the service after. Reports have claimed that as she was Supreme Governor of the Church of England, she didn't feel it was right to attend the civil ceremony of two divorcees.

Behind closed doors at the reception she showed her support for Charles' marriage. As per royal biographer Robert Jobson in Queen Elizabeth II, the Queen "could be the proud mother" at their reception and "showed it by breaking convention" and making a speech.

Putting the institution ahead of "sentiment" might sound impossibly hard, but this was something monarchs like Queen Elizabeth - and now King Charles - must seemingly face.

Emma is a Royal Editor with nine years of experience in publishing. She specialises in writing about the British Royal Family, covering everything from protocol to outfits. Alongside putting her extensive royal knowledge to good use, Emma knows all there is to know about the latest TV shows on the BBC, ITV and more. When she’s not writing about the latest royal outing or unmissable show to add to your to-watch list, Emma enjoys cooking, long walks and watching yet more crime dramas!

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