'It's hard for me not to have my person' - Lily Allen reveals the difficulties of dating in her 40s after marriage breakdown

Two decades after her debut into the music scene, Lily Allen has dropped a surprise fifth album - her first after a seven year hiatus.

Said to have been recorded in mere days, and arriving on October 24, West End Girl is rumoured to allude to Lily's difficult split from David Harbour, which both parties are reluctant to publicly talk about.

The impact it had on the singer remains clear however - shortly after news of their separation broke, she took a break from the Miss Me podcast she hosts with Miquita Oliver, to spend some time in a treatment facility.

Lily has since stepped away from the podcast on a more permanent basis, although has suggested she'll make a return at some point. Now, she is facing dating in her 40s, and has opened up about the challenges this throws in her path.

"It’s hard for me to not have my person, you know?" the singer said in conversation with Perfect Magazine. Sharing that she's quite "codependent," she added "I find it difficult to lean on the people who are available to me when I’m missing the comfort and stability of what is not available to me."

Feeling “exhausted” by the thought of looking for love, Lily shares, "the dating scene is much harder as a 40-year-old woman with two teenage children than it is for a 34-year-old woman.

The singer shares daughters Ethel, 13 and Marnie, 12, with first husband, Sam Cooper. Her thoughts on midlife dating as a single mother can be summed her simple evaluation, "it’s bitterly disappointing."

Lily also revealed feeling an element of "humiliation and shame" at dating in her 40s. "The world doesn’t portray women of my age as being desirable," she explains, adding, "and it just feels like climbing up a mountain."

While she wants to have love and stability, Lily feels pulled in two directions - another side of her doesn't want to get hurt, and can't face the challenges she's outlined that make dating as an older woman so daunting.

"I don’t have to get involved with it," she says of the search for love," adding, "but something in me says that I do."

However, after writing her new album in December 2024 - the same month as her split from David - and taking time to get support for her mental health, the star might need a little more time to process and heal before getting back into the dating game.

It appears the album could've been cathartic in the process of acknowledging how the singer's life had just been dramatically turned upside down.

She remains guarded over just how much of the lyrics directly refers to the troubles within her former marriage. "I made this record in December 2024 and it was a way for me to process what was happening in my life," she told Vogue.

"There are things that are on the record that I experienced within my marriage, but that’s not to say that it’s all gospel,” she continues, adding, "it is inspired by what went on in the relationship."

When asked how she felt while making West End Girl, Lily concludes, sadly, "confusion, sorrow, grief, helplessness."