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The yab yum sex position is another great example of how tantric sex is working its way into the mainstream. Rather than being something exclusively for those with an intimate knowledge of Tantra, education around the spiritual practice has made it accessible to everyone.
This intimate move is one of the most common Tantra practices and combines sex, meditation, and yoga into one, offering couples the chance to get deeply intimate with one another through a physical connection and better emotional wellbeing.
If you're looking to build on your list of the best sex positions with an easy tantric sex position and all the benefits it has to offer, there's no better position than the yab yum to start with. Here, a certified sexologist reveals everything you need to know about the yab yum sex position and how to try it for yourself.
What is the yab yum sex position?
The yab yum is a partner-facing move, explains certified sex educator Suzannah Weiss (opens in new tab). The partner penetrating sits cross-legged on the bed or the floor and the partner sits on top of them. "If you are on top, you'll be on your partner's lap and you'll wrap your arms and legs around them and rock back and forth," she says. "Your partner will have their arms around your waist."
Rather than bouncing up and down like you might do in the face off sex position or the classic cowgirl, however, the top partner in the yab yum sex position especially moves backward and forward in a grinding motion. "Instead of mimicking the thrusting motion of a person on top, the yab yum allows for a back-and-forth motion that tends to be better," says Weiss, who is also a sex and love coach as the resident sexologist for pleasure product brand Biird (opens in new tab).
Because of this, it's best to try the sex position on a flat, soft surface with support for both partners' legs - like a bed or carpeted floor. However, the yab yum is relatively versatile as positions go, so you could always try it on a chair too. You'll both need to let your legs hang loosely and the partner being penetrated on top should be able to touch the floor with their feet to support the gentle rocking motion.
What are the benefits of the tantric position?
1. The yab yum offers better G-spot stimulation
The slow rocking motion may be hugely beneficial for those who want to have an orgasm through G-spot stimulation. Along with plenty of lube, the back-and-forth movement encouraged by yab yum may be better for targeting the internal wall of the vagina than other positions like the butterfly sex position, for instance.
"This type of stimulation can even lead to orgasm or squirting for some," the sexologist says, especially if you can maintain it for an extended period.
2. Top partner is in control in the yab yum
The yab yum sex position can be a hugely empowering one for the person on top because they get to set the pace, rhythm, and motion of the movement, explains Weiss. While the person on the bottom will be penetrating, the angle and intensity of this is entirely controlled by the person on top as they can move towards their partner or away from them as they like.
"One study by Charles University (opens in new tab) has even found that a woman's likelihood of having an orgasm through intercourse was correlated with how often she was on top in a face-to-face position," she says.
3. The yab yum helps you to connect with your partner
If you're looking to learn how to be intimate without sex with your partner, the yab yum can also offer a lot of help - even though it's traditionally a sex position. Important elements of the practice are eye gazing, closeness, and synchronized breathing, all of which you can practice with clothes on, to begin with. Sit opposite each other and try to bring your breaths into time with each other, before sitting on top of your partner.
"Then, the fact that you are both wrapped around each other will make sex feel extra emotionally connective for both of you," adds Weiss.
How to make the yab yum sex position even better
If you find the cross-legged position uncomfortable, don't be concerned about moving your legs to find a position that works better for you. Many adults can't comfortably sit and cross their legs on the floor for any length of time, especially with additional weight on top of them. Change things up by having your legs out straight or at an angle, place a folded blanket underneath your ankles to reduce irritation there, or a pillow under the knees to reduce any tightness around the hips.
Once you've found the sitting position that works for you, you can enhance the yab yum by getting as close as possible to your partner. "You can enhance intimacy in any position by looking into your partner's eyes," says Weiss. "This is a way to connect more deeply to them and intensify your sensations. Communication is also a great way to increase intimacy, whether that means moaning, telling your partner what feels good, or asking them to switch things up."
A digital health journalist with over five years experience writing and editing for UK publications, Grace has covered the world of health and wellbeing extensively for Cosmopolitan, The i Paper and more.
She started her career writing about the complexities of sex and relationships, before combining personal hobbies with professional and writing about fitness. Everything from the best protein powder to sleep technology, the latest health trend to nutrition essentials, Grace has a huge spectrum of interests in the wellness sphere. Having reported on the coronavirus pandemic since the very first swab, she now also counts public health among them.
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