The 9 best dating apps for relationships if you're looking for love in 2023

The idea of downloading one of the best dating apps for relationships has probably come to mind if you're looking for love in 2023. About 300 million people use dating apps worldwide, with around 20 million users paying for premium features on the likes of Hinge, Bumble, and Tinder. But with so many on the market now, it's difficult to know where to begin if you want to find a real, long-lasting connection.

Dating apps provide a huge pool of people to chat to and match with, but not everyone will be on the same page and looking for a long-term relationship. Many will be swiping to find their next one night stand or no-strings-attached fling, and while there's nothing wrong with that, if you're looking for something serious you'll need to choose another type of dating app.

If you do want to find a committed relationship and avoid the pitfalls of ghosting, zombieing and even breadcrumbing, then our guide below could help you narrow down the best dating apps for relationships - and avoid the sex apps altogether. Based on my own findings, trialing and testing each of these apps, I evaluated and ranked each app in terms of accessibility, pricing options, match compatibility, safety features, and more. 

How I tested the best dating apps for relationships

• Consider how safe the app is to use: Is it a well-known dating app with millions of users worldwide? Does it use a verification process to make sure that every user is who they say they are? How is your data protected? These are all important questions to consider before choosing your app. I've gone into details for each of the apps in our selection to help you decide. 
• Free trial: It's important to be able to (at least) have a scroll through one of the best dating apps for relationships before investing your money in a subscription. I've made sure that each of the apps on our list offers some free features or usage time to users. 
• What age is the average user? Many of the apps out there cater for people between the ages of 25 and 40 maximum. However, there are people of all ages on the apps I've listed below so don't be put off by the average user age. This is more of an FYI. If you'd rather go on an app specifically designed for over 40 users, I've collected the best of these as well on the list. 
• Ease of use: When testing each of these dating apps, I made sure only the best ones made the list. Part of the process was making sure each app was easy to use because there's no point in trying to find love on a platform you can't work your way around. I also considered whether there were regular updates and whether the app was available on both Android and iPhone devices. 
• Matching features: The days of simply swiping through potential partners is long gone. It's important to consider how you want to match with people. Do you prefer to swipe or would you rather be matched based on a dating algorithm? I've got options for both.

Best dating apps for relationships

eHarmony claims to have helped over 2 million people find love since the early 2000s. Those wanting to sign up have to complete a compatibility quiz, compromising of 60 to 70 questions, including your style of communication and your core values. After completing the quiz, the app then suggests matches based on your answers and the preferences that you specify, for example, age, location, etc. 

As eHarmony takes its role as a matchmaker seriously, I found that most of the matches were based on compatibility. It uses the questionnaire process to weed out people who are more suited for flings or short-term relationships, with questions based on your future intentions and whether you’re seeking something serious. It was on this basis that I concluded that eHarmony was one of the best dating apps for relationships as you'll be matched with those who have the same dating intentions as you. 

However, as a basic member, I found that you could only see a limited amount of each match's profile information. It isn’t until you pay for the full membership that you can view your match’s photos and send them a message. 

If you’ve been single for a while, chances are that you’ve heard of Bumble. The communication rules of the app mean women must like a profile before the profile owner can message them. Women must also be the ones to start chatting. This unique feature means you can avoid any unsolicited messages and start a conversation when you feel ready. 

The app caters for all kinds of relationships, so you won't be able to immediately tell if someone if after a simple fling or a long-term commitment. It's a great app for getting out there in the dating world, but you'll have to speak to any matches you make about your intentions to discover theirs. If you're looking to set your preferences early on, eHarmony may be a better pick. 

One annoying element of the app is that if you or your match don’t reply within 24 hours of them sending a message, then the connection will expire. This can make maintaining a conversation tricky if you don’t open the app often. The app has optional premium features to enhance your experiences, such as Bumble Boost (which extends time on your matches and allows you to backtrack), Bumble Premium, SuperSwipe, and Spotlight, so there are options if you're able to spend a little money on your dating app. 

Match.com has been around since 1995, and over the years, has updated its interface to fit the needs of modern daters. The biggest appeal of Match is its uncomplicated signup process. After users provide basic profile information, they can sign up for both swipe-style dating (mutual matches) and traditional profile-style dating, where you scan your search area for people who match your dating specifications. 

Another benefit of Match is that you can alter your criteria, meaning that if you want to widen or close your age parameters, you can do without having to redo your whole profile. There are also several search options on the app if you choose to go down the profile route. 

While Match.com is one of the best dating apps for relationships thanks to the fairly straightforward signing-up process, using both the online version and the app can be tricky because of the sheer number of pop-ups and advertisements. 

OkCupid is another dating site that has been around for a while, but in recent years, the platform has changed to a swipe app, much like Tinder and Bumble. Following an initial sign-up questionnaire of around 15 questions, the app then shows you potential matches that you can choose to like. Whether you're searching for a rebound relationship or a more serious partnership, there's something here for you.

OkCupid operates on a mutual match system, meaning that you only hear from people who also say they like you. Unfortunately, the questionnaire isn’t very thorough, so in my opinion, the matches don’t always feel like they’re based on compatibility. That being said, if you want to cast your net wide, OkCupid has a user base of around 50 million, so you’re not likely to run out of potential matches.  

If you’re looking for the best dating sites for over 50, then Silver Singles is a great place to start. The dating platform uses what it calls the ‘Big Five Factor Questionnaire’, which evaluates your personality across five dimensions, including openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. The questionnaire can take around 30-60 minutes to complete, depending on how much time you spend on the questions. Based on this, the app will then send you three to seven matches each day. 

Easy-to-read profiles are a major plus point of Silver Singles and compared to other apps like Bumble, there is more of a focus on helping people find serious relationships. The app also has a coaching option for those who want to find out more about dating, such as fun ideas for dates, how to spice up a relationship, and more. 

Plenty of Fish (PoF) is another great app for anyone over 40 looking to start dating. Much like many of the other big-name apps, this one's also been around since the early 2000s and has made a name for itself as one of the earliest proper dating sites. While this is a plus point in many ways, as there are lots of users on the app and the website, it does mean that the platform has attracted a lot of fake profiles. It's important to be wary of these and if something doesn't seem right, then it probably isn't. 

However, there are plenty of authentic users on PoF so it's worth trying out for yourself. The sign-up process is fairly straightforward, and from there, users can build a profile with their interests. One major benefit of this app is that its basic membership is free to use. The app also has premium membership options and ‘token’ purchases, which can buy you upgrades and perks, but these aren’t essential if you’re just looking for a basic dating app to connect you with people. 

One unique feature of PoF is the Live! element of the platform. This allows you to go beyond a user's platform and you can see what they're like in person, from the comfort of your own living room, much like similar features on Facebook and Instagram. Users can live stream their activities, whether it be them talking to the camera or doing their favorite hobby, and interested potential matches can tune in. It's certainly a feature for the more extraverted among us but if you're looking for this in a partner, it's one way to go. 

Despite being less well-known than Plenty of Fish or Match.com, Dating.com has a great rating on the app store and over 73 million registered users. If you’re looking for a serious relationship, then the app has an ‘I’m feeling’ profile feature, which allows you to filter the sort of relationship you want to pursue and you'll only match with those who also have this feature in their profile.

When you initially sign up for a trial of the app, you receive 15 free tokens to try out messaging and other features. Unfortunately, without paying for more tokens, you can’t continue messaging your matches.  

Owned by Match.com, Our Time is a dating website aimed at those over 50, similar to Silver Singles, which we’ve mentioned above. Our Time has a pretty straightforward sign-up process, I found, and once users have created their profile, they can find mutual matches through ‘Our Picks’ or search for other users. 

The ‘Our Picks’ option gives you around eight matches a day that you can like or pass. If you like a match, then you’ll be able to message them. While there are plenty of users signed up to Our Time, the lack of verification needed to sign up can attract fake profiles. While there are plenty of great feature on Our Time, so it's worth having a peruse if you're looking to sign up to an app with a more mature audience, because of this lack of verification, we’d recommend sticking to apps with more security features such as eHarmony if you're concerned about this. 

If you’re looking for the best lesbian dating apps, we've got you covered. As one of the earliest dating apps for women, HER goes head-to-head with the likes of Tinder to help women of all ages find love in their local area.

HER’s big selling point is that it connects social media profiles with your dating profile, meaning that you’re less likely to come across any fake users and, much like Tinder, you could find that you have a mutual connection. The app is made for queer women, by queer women, which means the app is ideal for those struggling to find connections on other apps due to the lack of LGBTQ+ users. The app has both free and premium options, and by paying the monthly fee, users can find out who has liked their profile, change their location, and find out who is currently online. Despite having responsive users and great safety features (there is a vetting process when signing up), the app has glitches that hinder the overall experience.  

How to find the best dating app for relationships for you

• Choose one where you can showcase your personality: If you're looking for love, finding someone will be about more than looks, so download an app where you can find people you have shared interests with. “If you want the best chance of finding a meaningful connection on an app, then you need to be completely real. Show yourself in your natural environment, doing things and hobbies that you love," says sex and relationship expert Annabelle Knight, who has qualifications in couples counselling and psychosexual therapy.
• Download an app where you can set your intentions early on: Many dating apps for relationships offer users the chance to say what they want on their profile, so you should be on the same page as those you match with. “If you’re after something long-term then say so - that way you shouldn’t end up talking to too many people with different intentions to yourself,” says Knight, who is working with sex toy and lingerie brand Lovehoney.  
• Prioritize security features: Security features and verification processes differ for each dating app, so find one that offers a level of protection you're comfortable with. There are also ways you can stay safe when chatting and meeting new people. "Don't give away too much when chatting and accidentally yourself vulnerable,” says MBACP relationship coach and counselor, Pascale Lane. “Avoid sharing personal information about where you live or information about your children, for example." 
• Choose one you actually enjoy using: If you download an dating app and decide you really don't like how it works, switch things up and download another one. Dating apps are supposed to be fun after all, Lane reminds us. "Keep your interactions light and don't look at each match as a person you’re going to be with for the rest of your life, but as an opportunity to get yourself out there." 

Do dating apps work?

Yes, dating apps have helped millions of people around the world meet their partner - whether that's their partner for right now, or a more long-term romance. And it looks as though 2023 could be the year where they work better than ever before, as Bumble recently found that one third of users have ended a marriage or a serious relationship in the past two years, and almost the same number are using the app for the first time. That's plenty of love manifestation potential.

In a study by the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, researchers found certain types of people are more likely to use dating apps than others. The study found that people with a more anxious attachment style were more likely to use dating apps than those with an avoidant attachment style. The study also found that 70% of people within the study were seeking more than just sex when they joined a dating app. 

“It's not all doom and gloom with dating apps,” confirms Lane. “Love and romance can blossom from such meetings, but the ease with which one person can have multiple conversations means that statistically, you’ll have to jump through a few more hoops than you anticipate.”

Not all dating apps cater to those wanting a serious relationship as well and dating burnout is a modern concept that plenty of people are relating to these days, which can lead to a lot of users feeling disheartened by the dating world. “As with any kind of dating, you need to tread carefully when you use dating apps for relationships,” says Lane. “The internet is awash with people masking their true selves and that goes across the genders without a doubt.”

What should you include in a dating profile?

“My advice here would be transparency,” says Lane. “If you are looking for marriage and children, say it. If you have a love of something quirky and it’s important to you to find someone who shares the same passion, say so.”

You don’t need to list out every tiny detail about yourself when you write a dating profile. Instead, think about your core values and how a relationship would fit into your everyday life. It’s worth thinking about how you like to receive and give love in a relationship as well, and finding out your love language can be a great place to start with this. 

“A dating profile isn't a job description, but an opportunity to share the things that are important to you,” says Lane. “This is your opportunity to make people want to know more about you, so do a good job of 'selling' yourself.”

Tips for using dating apps to find a relationship

• Outline your interests from the beginning: "List your interests or show them in your pictures on your profile, particularly anything you might consider a deal breaker, such as their political persuasion, as this will narrow your matches down to those that are more suitable," says Knight. 
• Tell matches what you want: "If you want to find a relationship from a dating app, then you should mention that in your bio,” says Knight. “There’s nothing wrong with just wanting a fling, but if you don’t, then you can skip a whole load of unsuitable matches by saying so."
• Be patient: "You will not find a relationship on a dating app overnight, unfortunately,” says Knight. “It may take time, so be patient and try not to rush. You might only want to talk to one person at a time and that’s OK."
• Get personal: "Small talk is great, but with dating apps, it’s better to be more personal, that way you find more about the other person,” says Knight. “Instead of asking ‘how are you’, ask them about a certain picture in their profile, or something about themselves that will help you learn more."