How to stop drinking alcohol for good: 12 tips from the experts to change your habits

You might be wondering how to stop drinking alcohol for good if Sober October has been a turning point for you. While four weeks of no alcohol can bring about short-term change, if you're finding alcohol doesn't have a positive place in your life anymore then it's worth exploring how to do it for good.

As you may know by now, our bodies love it when we don't drink alcohol. We sleep better, wake up fewer times in the night, and sleep deeper. Our brains can work at full function, motoneurones firing away, keeping us energised and able to concentrate. There are fewer bumps and bruises from bumping into things after one too many glasses, and even our gut health appreciates it when we don't have a drink every day.  

But while the benefits are obvious, knowing how to avoid alcohol for the first few months or years of sobriety can be a challenge, with so much of our lives (whether we like it or not) revolving around alcohol. Here, woman&home speaks to a neuroscientist, a recovery coach, and two psychologists to reveal their actionable, real life-friendly tips for quitting alcohol in the long-term. 

How to stop drinking alcohol for good

1. Get rid of any alcohol you have at home

It can be so tempting to hang onto any undrunk bottles of beer, wine, and spirits thinking that they'll be drunk by someone else at another time. But Jacqueline Carson, a clinical hypnotherapist and psychotherapist, says the best approach is to pour it down the sink. 

"Don't even give it away, pour it down the sink," she suggests. "If you give it away to someone else, you will continue to think you are depriving yourself of something nice subconsciously. By getting rid of it down the sink, you give yourself a very clear subconscious message that it's toxic and harmful to you and that you have decided to take care of yourself and your health."

Jacqueline Carson

Jacqueline Carson is a clinical hypnotherapist, psychotherapist and meditation teacher. After being diagnosed with breast cancer in 2014, Carson left her corporate job to retrain as a clinical hypnotherapist, using the techniques to quit smoking and drinking herself. 

She now works with women around the world using her experience and expertise to support them to transform their lives and create a sustainable healthy lifestyle.

2. Tell others about your decision

It might feel daunting to tell family and friends, who you've likely enjoyed a drink with in the past, that you're going tee-total for good but it'll make things easier, says Smriti Joshi, a psychologist specialising in addiction. "Family and friends can offer encouragement, serve as accountability partners, or even join you in your new endeavour," she says. 

Carson agrees - but also suggests you create boundaries around your loved ones and alcohol. "If they choose to drink, ask them to do this when you're not around and not to flaunt it in front of you," she says. "You don't need to give them a full explanation of why you no longer wish to drink if you don't want to either. The main thing is that they respect your decision."

Joshi, who is also the chief psychologist at Wysa, says that some people also find social media to be a supportive arm of this. "If you feel comfortable, share your objective on social media platforms or join groups online where you can gain advice, share experiences, and get encouragement from those on a similar journey."

But she also has a warning: "Be careful here. Not everyone will be supportive and there is the risk that your habits become more performative than your own lifestyle and health," she says. 

Smriti Joshi

Smriti Joshi is a psychologist with over 25 years of experience in the field. She specialises in digital mental health and the ethical delivery of digital mental health services and support, with experience in addiction therapy. Joshi is also the chief psychologist at Wysa, a platform for on-demand anonymous mental health support. 

3. Write down all the reasons you want to stop drinking

Write down all of the reasons you want to stop drinking, what outcomes you want to achieve, and the benefits of not drinking alcohol anymore. "Note down as many as you can and be honest with yourself, read these every morning, carry them with you, and read them periodically throughout the day. You can also write the consequences of continuing to drink here," says Carson.

"Any time you think of drinking alcohol, read your reasons. You can even record them on your phone or other device and listen through headphones as much as you need throughout the day," she adds. "This will ensure that your subconscious gets a very clear message which will eventually rewire how you think about alcohol." 

4. Understand your triggers

In the same vein, Joshi suggests those looking to learn how to give up alcohol for good look at the triggers behind wanting to drink. That way, you're more likely to be able to avoid having the urge entirely. 

"Understand what prompts you to drink. Is it stress? Boredom? Social events at home? Once you identify these triggers, work on strategies to cope without alcohol," she says. "For instance, if stress is a trigger, you might practice relaxation techniques like meditation or deep breathing. If boredom is the issue, find a new hobby or engage in activities that keep you occupied and interested." 

5. Change your habits

One trigger may even just be getting home from work and sitting down on your sofa. If you're used to sitting down after work, after dinner, with your partner, and so on with a drink in your hand, that's something that needs to change. 

As well as finding one of the best alternatives to alcohol to drink instead, recovery coach Elizabeth Walker suggests more drastic action. "If you are used to coming home and sitting in particular spot while sipping your favourite tipple, move your furniture. Not only are you redesigning your space, you are also helping yourself break that habit by consciously considering how to move through your home space, while also having a different view when you do sit down."

It makes sense, says Joshi, since a lot of our drinking comes down to routine and habit. "Often alcohol consumption becomes tied to specific cues or routines," she says. "Breaking this association can be key to reducing your alcohol intake."

Elizabeth Walker

Elizabeth Walker is a professional recovery coach, meditation teacher and ICF accredited life coach. She has over two decades of experience in the wellness industry, including work within treatment centres. Elizabeth’s mission is to to make a positive impact on the success rates in addiction recovery, helping her clients to rediscover their inner resilience, regain control over their lives, and uncover a future brimming with hope. 

6. Reduce your stress

It goes without saying that learning how to beat stress and avoid burnout can be instrumental in learning how to stop drinking alcohol for good, considering that many of us use alcohol to wind down. 

"Staying calm and relaxed will help to keep you in control of your mindset and will also soothe your nervous system," says Carson. "When your mind and body is not stressed it is less likely to crave alcohol. Once you allow stress to take hold, the old patterns of thinking could lead to you wanting a drink." 

Everyone destresses in different ways, and it's not always possible to avoid stress entirely, but maintaining in some good management techniques can help. 

7. Embrace mindfulness

Mindfulness can be one of these beneficial stress management techniques, says Eldin Hasa, a neuroscientist and human behaviour expert. "It can serve as a powerful tool to heighten your awareness of your thoughts, emotions, and cravings associated with alcohol," he explains. 

To use mindfulness to help you learn how to stop drinking alcohol for good, Hasa suggests that when a craving arises, to take a moment to calmly observe it without passing judgement. "Identify the triggers and underlying emotions that may be fuelling the yearning for a drink, then take a pen and paper and journal your findings," he says. 

"By cultivating this self-awareness, you can gain a deeper understanding of the patterns and catalysts that lead to alcohol consumption, enabling you to react in a more wholesome and healthier manner."

Other forms of mindfulness including walking meditation, combining the stress-relieving effects of the outdoors and exercise together, sophrology, or a meditation session in-person or with one of the best meditation apps. 

8. Find alternatives you enjoy

On the road to stopping drinking alcohol for good, you might decide that you want to ease into it by learning how to cut down on alcohol. One of the best ways to do this is to find an alternative you enjoy - like one of the best non-alcoholic spirits to replace your gin and tonic, no- and low-alcohol wines, and alcohol-free beers. 

With more people going sober than ever before, there's more options than ever before so you don't have to compromise at home or when you're out.  

"If you do want to enjoy a special drink in the evening, you can become a tea connoisseur, experimenting in various herbal teas, fruit smoothies, mocktails, or making a pitcher of water and adding fruits and berries to make it pretty," suggests Carson. "There are a lot of non-alcoholic wines and beers available on the market now which you can also drink." 

However, she warns: "Some of these may tempt you to drink an actual alcoholic drink due to experiencing the taste. If you feel this could be the case for you, I would recommend avoiding them and staying with the tea or water." Some of the best non-alcoholic drinks in a can can be a good option too, as they include sparkling drinks made with fruits, kombucha, and botantical infusions. 

9. Find a new hobby

One of the best long-term changes we can make to learn how to stop drinking alcohol for good is picking up a new hobby. It may not be possible to change your job or everyday life, but changing something in our lives can help rewire our brains, explains Hasa. 

"The brain forges neural connections through repeated actions. By intentionally partaking in fresh activities and adopting new habits, you can assist in rewiring your brain, steering it away from associations linked to alcohol," he says. "For instance, instead of instinctively reaching for a beverage after work, why not try engaging in an alternative endeavour. As time progresses, these newfound behaviours can supplant the old neural pathways tied to alcohol." 

This new activity, importantly, should be one that you enjoy. This isn't the time to take up a committment to run 20 minutes a day and sign up to a marathon if you don't enjoy running and never have. Doing something you enjoy, whether that's cycling as a workout or pickleball, will always be best. 

"It should be something that stimulates the brain's reward system in healthier ways," says Hasa. "Exercise, hobbies, socialising, and pursuing interests can help to create new neural pathways that provide a sense of reward and fulfillment."

Walker says this these new hobbies are best done around a group other sober, likeminded people, as it will further help remove the drinking temptation. "Activities such as painting, drawing, dancing, writing, decorating, colouring in, gardening, crafting, exercise or cooking can help relieve boredom and stress which can be a trigger for reaching for a drink," she says. 

"And I highly recommend finding a community of like minded non-drinkers online or in real life that you can reach out to when the doubt creeps in or the urge to pick up a drink hits. It is also really helpful to hear the experiences of people on a similar journey to you," she says. 

10. Develop a positive morning and evening routine

As the experts have said, habits are an important part of how to stop drinking alcohol for good - and routines are no different. Maintaining habits and hobbies away from alcohol mean you're more likely to stick to your sobriety, but Carson also says that your routine (both morning and evening) can also be important for starting your day and leaving it with the best intentions. 

"Consider developing a morning routine that includes affirmations, mediation and/or self hypnosis. These will not only keep you calm but will eventually rewire your brain so that eventually you no longer think about drinking," she says. "You can also practice something like yoga as a workout, which will strengthen your mind and body as well as keeping you calm and relaxed."

An evening routine, including a pre-set bedtime and pre-bedtime ritual can also help. "Set a suitable bedtime and enjoy an evening of reading, gentle yoga nidra, meditation, and a lovely warm bath by candlelight. No phones or devices. Getting plenty of sleep allows the body to rest and repair, to detox and heal."

11. Do more exercise

Exercise can be another great tool in sobriety, the experts agree. Not only does it fit into the changing habits category of a new hobby, it makes for an excellent addition to a daily routine. Research from Imam Khomeini International University, for example, suggests that working out in the morning not only activates the metabolic and physiological activities of the body but it can boost your energy levels and improve mental clarity.

"Regular exercise triggers the release of endorphins,  which are natural chemicals in the brain that uplift mood," Hasa agrees. 

12. Seek professional help

Finally, if you need some help to learn how to give up alcohol for good, you're not alone. It's thought that over 7.5 million people in the UK alone show signs of an alcohol dependence. 

"If you're struggling to give up alcohol on  your own, consider seeking support from healthcare professionals who specialise in addiction. They can provide personalised guidance, therapy,  and medication if necessary," says neuroscientist Hasa. 

Do you become happier when you stop drinking?

Many people find themselves happier when they give up alcohol, regardless of whether they have a drinking problem or just find that alcohol takes more from their life than it offers. Needless to say, there are numerous benefits of not drinking alcohol. 

However, if you're a regular drinker who drinks a lot then when you first give up drinking, you might find your happiness levels take a dip to start with. As neuroscientist Hasa explains, alcohol affects the brain by altering the levels of neurotransmitters like dopamine, which are involved in the brain's reward system. 

"This leads to pleasurable feelings and reinforces the desire to repeat the behaviour," he says. "Over time, the brain adapts to the presence of alcohol, leading to tolerance and the need for increased amounts to achieve the same effect." 

In a similar way, alcohol has sedative effects which reduce feelings of anxiety and stress. "This can create cycle where individuals rely on alcohol to cope with negative emotions or situations, reinforcing this behaviour."

So when you first give up alcohol, your brain doesn't receive the hit of dopamine it's used to, which can mean you feel unhappier. However, it's not an effect that lasts forever. "The brain has remarkable plasticity and can recover from the effects of alchol over time. It just takes time for neural pathways to readjust, so be patient and allow your brain to heal as you continue on your journey towards sobriety," says Hasa. 

Chances are, you'll feel better simply because you're more likely to sleep better. "Your sleep should improve as you stop drinking," says Carson. "You might find you sleep deeper and for longer without waking."

In turn, she says, this supports your immune system and your brain, so you're less likely to suffer with seasonal colds and flus, and have more energy through the day.