‘You are not broken’ - Dr Amir read my mind with this much-needed message for women holding Christmas together

I started my week with an early morning catch up with woman&home content director Anna Bailey, and, as usual, our conversation started with how we'd spent the weekend.

As Anna told me about some lovely plans she had enjoyed with her family and friends, a wave of sadness came over me. It all sounded so festive and joyful in comparison to the few days I had spent navigating illness with kids, plans changing, the ever-looming feeling that I still have so much to get ready for Christmas and the growing worry that something - or, more importantly, someone - has been forgotten.

I suddenly felt quite teary, and when Anna asked how my weekend was, I struggled to hold it together. ‘I just feel really flat, and I don’t know why’.

I love Christmas, always have, but this year particularly, December has flown by and I feel desperately underprepared - which is not a great situation to find yourself in with three young children whose excitement levels are through the roof.

As always, Anna was unbelievably supportive, but I came off the call wondering how I am ever going to be ready in time, and if, indeed, I will feel the festive spirit I'm longing for. And, as if by magic, Dr Amir popped up on my Instagram feed with this message:

As I listened to our resident GP explain how 'every year around Christmas he sees the same thing in his clinic - women who are exhausted, emotional, run down and quietly asking themselves 'why can't I cope', it felt like he was reading my mind.

And when he followed with 'the answer is there is nothing wrong with you', I could have cried with relief. I listened intently to the rest of Dr Amir's video, soaking in the science behind Christmas burnout and nodding furiously at how it hits women harder because of the responsibility of it all.

'Women are expected to carry Christmas, to plan it, remember it, feel it, to anticipate everyone else's needs, their gifts, their meals, family dynamics, often without being asked. Now layer on to that hormones, PMS, perimenopause, menopause and stress hormones like cortisol that stay high all day long... '

Never before had I felt so seen. And the acknowledgement from not only Dr Amir but from the hundreds of women in the comments saying they felt it too was such a comfort.

'The message so many women deserve to hear', one wrote in the comments.

'This is such a relief to hear this. I get myself into such a state trying to be perfect and I always feel like I’ve let people down. Not one person in my family ever complains either in fact the opposite they love coming. But it’s about putting pressure on myself I guess I need to relax more', said another.

I completely agree with that last comment particularly. So much of the expectation and pressure of Christmas comes from myself, but the societal pressure to make Christmas magical is also undeniable. And so I'm clinging tightly to Dr Amir's much-needed words of wisdom for the foreseeable:

'If you feel more tearful, more irritable, craving sugar or just feeling overwhelmed, that's not weakness, that's biology colliding with social pressure. You are not broken. You are not required to be perfect this Christmas. You don't have to hold everything together. And you don't have to make it magical at your own expense. Lowering the bar isn't failing, it's self protection. Rest isn't laziness. Saying no isn't selfish. If Christmas feels heavy this year, you are not broken, you're not doing anything wrong, you are just human. And sometimes the healthiest thing you can do is do less and let that be enough'.