11 tips for better conversations when caring for someone with dementia

Despite the deterioration of mind and memory, the essence of someone’s spirit and their best personality qualities often remain right until the end.


Alzheimer’s is a disease that affects over 520,000 people in the UK.

It is a disease that affects the brain, most commonly in the over 65s age group. While there are plenty of ways that loved ones with it will retain their personality traits, when visiting people with Alzheimer’s, it is important to bear some things in mind.

These tips will help you talk to someone with dementia so that you both get the most out of the conversation

✢ Make eye contact

It’s vital they see you, so try to be at the same level as their head. Don’t stand or hover over them.

✢ Speak slowly

Halve your normal speed, ideally, and take a breath between sentences so they can catch up.

This Dementia Action Week, it’s time to start talking. Find out more atalzheimers.org.uk/DAW

✢ Avoid the R word (remember)

They may feel angry, insulted or embarrassed.

✢ Don’t talk down or correct them

They’re not children.

✢ Validate their feelings

Phrases like “I can see you’re angry/sad/upset” may help them to feel less isolated.

✢ Take props

Photos or music may bring up happy memories.

✢ Allow them to repeat themselves

Let them tell the old stories on a loop. If they’re asking the same question over and over again, be patient and answer as if for the first time because for
them, it feels like that.

✢ Keep visiting

Even if they don’t appear to know who you are, your contact may be vital to them.

✢ If they get agitated, change the activity or subject

Start afresh, there’s nothing to lose.

✢ Use their name frequently

In a subtle and natural manner.

✢ Ask first before touching them

Check before taking their hand in case they think you’re grabbing.

For help and information, contact Alzheimer’s Society at alzheimers.org.uk.

You’ll find plenty more tips for helping you through this difficult time.