For most of us, our primary school years were the glory days. When all we had to worry about was spelling tests, petty playground politics, remembering not to leave our jumper on the school field (again!) and, most importantly – what was on the lunch menu.
Remember feasting on ‘frogs spawn’? Desperately finding ways to dispose of the food you feared to swallow – hiding it under other your napkin, wrapping it in a hanky or quickly swiping it to the floor? Then these ten things we loved to hate about school dinners will transport
you back to those precious afternoons spent in the dingey
1. Meat and potato pie
Constructed in a giant metal baking tray, this ‘pie’ was deep filled with gravy, beef, potato and the occasional piece of gristle. A deliciously thick layer of pastry was thrown over the top and when served, the rasping sound as the dinner ladies scraped out your portion was enough to make your eyes water.
2. Fudge tart
A pastry bottomed tart topped with a generous layer of thick, gooey fudge and topped with grated chocolate. Yum!
3. Semolina with jam
The milky porridge-like dessert that was thankfully sweetened with a generous dollop of jam. Semolina is like Marmite – you either love it or hate it!
4. Mashed potato
Complete with hard lumps and suspect grey flecks, mashed potato was just one option from a medley of vile vegetables – grey overcooked cauliflower, stringy beans and watery cabbage.
5. Lumpy pink custard
The one redeeming characteristic of this lumpy custard as it came glugging out of those rusted metal jugs and swamped our sponge puddings, was its vibrant colour. Even if its unpalatable consistency was hard to stomach, it looked great.
6. Liver, onion and bacon
This meaty concoction was served in a large, deep baking tray and the gravy would often congeal before you reached your seat. It’s the dish you can hold responsible for liver’s bad reputation.
7. Jam roly poly pudding
One of the fonder memories from your school dinner days. A roll of jammy, spongey goodness. What more could you ask for?
8. Spam fritters
Laid out on a stainless steel trays,
dripping with fat, when battered Spam fritters appeared on the menu,
entire classrooms of faces dropped.
9. Jelly and ice cream
Such a delicious concept and yet, with tasteless, watery jelly and foamy ice cream, it was never as tasty as you’d hoped. If you were lucky, it was sweetened with sprinkles of sugar strands and nobbly bobblies.
With its tacky, gooey texture and tasteless flavour, the nickname ‘frogs spawn’ was a frighteningly accurate description of tapioca!
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