I stopped saving my ‘best’ homeware for special occasions – and it's made me enjoy my home so much more

The expensive candle, the fancy handwash, the nice dinner plates you normally save for guests... most of us have homeware that serves as our pride and joy, the kind of items that make us beam simply by looking at them.

And yet, most of us also aren't using our 'best' homeware often enough. Whether we're talking about the best scented candles or the best bed sheets, these are the type of items that are often tucked away in the back of a cupboard somewhere, collecting dust until we can 'justify' getting them out again.

And while it is nice to show off our favourite homeware pieces to guests, it's just as nice to use them ourselves in the ordinary day-to-day. There’s clearly some psychology behind why we save our favourite homeware for special occasions, but I wanted to know whether using mine more regularly might make those ordinary, everyday moments feel a little more special too.

I decided to stop saving my 'best' homeware for special occasions – it's been a learning curve

So, after committing to getting my fancy bedding, nice coasters, and posh dinner plates out of the cupboard, how would I feel using them on just an ordinary Tuesday, with no one but myself to enjoy them with? Safe to say that it's been a pretty interesting learning curve, and I'm now a firm believer in using our favourite homeware pieces 'just because'.

Why do we save our 'best' homeware for special occasions?

It turns out there is a reason why we save our best homeware for special occasions. In particular, items that cost more than we'd usually spend or were given to us as a gift are less likely to get used on a standard day.

It's a behaviour researchers Suzanne Shu and Marissa Sharif describe as 'occasion matching': essentially, we want the occasion on which we use something special to feel worthy of the item. Part of the reason appears to be anticipated regret – we're worried we'll use our favourite thing now, only for a more deserving opportunity to come along later. The trouble is that we can wait so long for the perfect moment that we miss plenty of perfectly good opportunities to enjoy it along the way.

Interestingly, this can become a bit of a loop, because the longer something sits unused, the more 'special' the occasion has to be for us to eventually use it. And it can be hard to find an occasion at home that matches our expectations.

What happened when I stopped saving things for special occasions

This certainly explains why the longer my 'nice' homeware stayed tucked away, the harder it became to get out. But these are ultimately things I have because I love them – and I started to wonder whether saving them was defeating the point.

The first test came from using my bedding from The White Company. Anything from this brand feels like a treat, even if you were lucky enough to get your hands on any of the must-haves in The White Company's summer sale.

Strangely, putting it on the bed for no particular reason felt almost wasteful at first. I had that familiar thought that I should save it for when the flat was looking especially tidy, or for a weekend when I had nothing planned and could properly 'appreciate' it.

But after a couple of nights, that feeling started to dissipate. Instead, I started looking forward to getting into bed more than usual, and I noticed how much nicer the room was looking as a whole. It made me wonder why I'd needed a good enough 'reason' to use it in the first place.

Next came my all-time favourite dinnerware set from Royal Worcester, a British heritage brand available at Portmeirion. I love the cute animal designs on the plates and bowls, and though they've made me smile every time I've got them out, I don't use them on a day-to-day basis. I usually get them out when we have guests over, as well as on birthdays and anniversaries.

This was probably the habit that felt strangest to break. I was so used to thinking of these plates as 'guest crockery' that serving an ordinary dinner on them felt a bit extravagant. There was also a little voice in my head telling me the more I used these plates, the greater the chances of chipping or breaking them.

Of course, after a few meals, they just became the plates I was using – but I was actually looking forward to getting them out. I just love them! Even a standard midweek meal felt more elevated, and again, I started to question what I'd been saving this set for. If they were good enough for guests, why weren't they good enough for me too?

Another luxury item that collects dust in my kitchen cupboards for most of the year: glassware. The nicest glasses tend to be the ones we reach for when friends come over, while everyday drinks get poured into whatever is easiest to grab (and cheapest to replace).

But using something a little more special with dinner was another small change that made an ordinary meal feel more elevated. After doing it a few times, it stopped feeling like I was 'wasting' the good glasses and started feeling normal. It feels like a real treat to have a regular soft drink in a fancy wine glass or gin goblet, and I'd recommend giving it a go if you're trying to avoid opening a bottle of wine.

This experiment started to have a bit of a snowball effect, and I began to realise just how many little luxuries were going unused around my home. I received a NEOM candle for Christmas last year, and it still hadn't been lit (luxury candles have always been a tricky one for me, as I know that once I've lit the wick, there's no going back to its pristine, brand-new state).

When I finally lit mine, I initially felt like I should make an occasion of it. But instead, I left it burning while I pottered around the flat one evening, and quickly realised that was exactly how I wanted to enjoy it. A gorgeous scent burning away in the background while I got on with my night.

I also realised that while luxury homeware is a real treat, some of my favourite things around the home, which I'd unknowingly been trying to keep in pristine condition, weren't necessarily the most expensive.

My favourite coasters, for example, come from an independent seller on Etsy and cost under £10. Because of how much I loved their rustic charm, I was avoiding using these as actual coasters and having them as more decorative pieces round my home. But once I started putting my hot drinks on them - i.e., using them for their intended purpose - I was able to enjoy them so much more. They even made my cup of tea feel like more of a treat, simply because they made me smile every time I reached for one.

The takeaway

Once I'd decided to stop saving things for special occasions, I was surprised at how quickly the novelty wore off – in a good way. Within a few days, sleeping in the nice bedding, eating from my favourite plates and actually using my coasters no longer felt extravagant. They simply became part of my home.

That's where the main attitude shift happened. In the past, I'd created a strange hierarchy where guests, celebrations and hypothetical future occasions were worthy of my favourite things, while my normal day-to-day life wasn't.

I'm definitely not suggesting we should stop looking after the things we love. But I've realised there's a difference between taking care of something and being so protective of it that you don't actually get to enjoy it.

I'll definitely be getting more from my favourite homeware pieces in the future.