Does society shame women who are in menopause? Natalie Imbruglia’s 'horrifying' experience sparks debate

Singer Natalie Imbruglia was "horrified" to find she felt "shame" when she hit perimenopause, not understanding where the feeling came from.

“I felt a glimmer of shame when I first hit perimenopause,” she said during an interview on BBC Woman’s Hour.

She continues, "I was quite horrified by that because I didn’t know where it was coming from, and I didn’t like it."

When asked where she thought the shame came from, Natalie shared that it might’ve come from saying goodbye to the potential to be fertile, but believes it could have stemmed from societal expectations and the patriarchy.

"I had certain people try to hush me if I tried to talk about it in front of a man," Natalie explains, adding, "And I thought, 'This is a mental health issue, every single woman goes through this, possibly for 12 years.'"

Eventually, it was the "glimmer of shame" that led the singer to speak out and share her experiences, to open the door for more women to do the same - to help challenge societal expectations and question patriarchal standards that tried to stop her.

Society appears to believe women should remain young - there's a hugely profitable industry all designed around keeping women insecure about their appearances and leading them to 'believe' they constantly need improving and the only outcome they need to feel happy is to remain youthful.

Hitting perimenopause and menopause is a big indicator that a woman is passing into a new phase of her life, and some might equate it with feeling 'old,' and therefore being unhappy and ashamed of something that's a natural process.

Natalie's comments sparked a debate in those commenting on the post when it was shared to Instagram.

Some agreed that fear of ageing contributes to "shame" about it, while others believe women and their bodies and bodily functions are shamed as soon as they start menstruating.

One person commented to say, "The shaming starts in western culture when we get our first period and never stops. Hiding period products, hiding blood, hiding our suffering. Peri and menopause are just an extension of that."

This is a good point, with young girls suffering with period challenges from heavy bleeding to unbearable pain each month, and many stories of doctors who haven't investigated or a medical profession that's been unable to help them.

Similarly, at the other end of the spectrum, perimenopause and menopause care has been non-existent until recent years, and there's a still a huge gap in the knowledge of healthcare professionals and medical misogyny when it comes to helping women going through challenges during this time.

Women then feel silenced by what's happening to their bodies, and in turn, feel shame. Another person commented to say, "We don’t talk enough about the shaming of women in perimenopause and menopause.

"We can no longer hold ourselves to society’s expectations of what a woman should be: accommodating, productive, attractive, calm, endlessly coping.

"Instead of compassion, we get criticism. Perhaps we’re not becoming 'too much.' Perhaps we just have less capacity to keep making ourselves smaller."

The debate in the comments was certainly very interesting, and Natalie's comments definitely sparked a lot of conversation and women wanting to share their own experiences.

Another person wrote, "That shame is so interesting, because it says something about the stories women absorb long before perimenopause actually arrives."

"The symptoms are one thing… the sudden sense that ageing has somehow made you less visible, less desirable or less yourself can be another layer entirely."

In answer to the question about whether or not society shames women in menopause - the collective experiences of women engaging with the Woman's Hour post strongly suggests that yes, it does.