Ruth Langsford shares emotional update on her mother’s health as she reflects on 'living grief'

Ruth Langsford lost her father, Dennis, to complications from dementia in 2012. Her 94-year-old mother, Joan, is also currently living with Alzheimer's disease and Ruth has shared an emotional update about her health and the "living grief" of witnessing a parent decline with the degenerative condition.

During a candid conversation with Jane Moore on Loose Women, whose mother also has dementia, Ruth says, "When you start thinking or feeling that your loved one doesn't have a quality of life," that the situation gets really hard.

She reveals that although her mum does still "have some quality of life," she's been quite unwell this year. Ruth shares that "each time" Joan has been ill, "her dementia will take a little dip."

"You have to be realistic," she says, adding, "dementia doesn't get better, you're just waiting for the inevitable."

This has led to the presenter stepping in to make sure life can be as good for her mum as it can be. "I always feel my job as her daughter is to always make sure she's comfortable, does she look happy - she still smiles, she still likes music," she explains.

Ruth continues, "She's not eating very much now, so there are all those signs, and it's really, really difficult to watch."

Adding her perspective, Jane shares, "You've said goodbye to someone a million times with dementia." She continues, "They say death by a thousand cuts, this is loss by a thousand cuts" as Ruth agrees, "It's a living grief, isn't it?"

Jane says with honesty that when the day comes that her mum passes away, she'll be "very upset," but will also "feel relief."

Ruth has previously shared concerns that after having two parents diagnosed with dementia, she might get it herself and worries about a genetic link "literally all the time".

She says, "If I ever have a senior moment where I go, ‘what’s her name again?’, somebody that I know quite well, and I have a complete and utter blank, it really frightens me."

She's also revealed the backlash she went through for making public the decision to put her mum in a care home.

Replying to a negative comment about it on social media, she wrote, "How dare you. You know nothing about my mother's medical needs, her requirements, how dare you."

Afterwards, she felt bad for becoming angry, but argued, "It just showed how much it hurt, you're feeling all those things yourself. It's a very hard thing for people, and I see it all the time."

"I do lots of things for Alzheimer's, the memory walk every year, and I chat to people, and that's the one thing people talk about the most, saying, 'I feel so bad because I put them [their relative] in a care home,'" she says.

At the time, she had some advice for anyone feeling guilt over making a similar decision about care homes. "Don't feel guilty, it's done with love, you are doing this with love," are her words of encouragement.