The risk of Downs syndrome starts to soar after 43, I seem to recall - I would think the stats are on the Internet fairly easily. So that is something you really do have to bear in mind. Could you raise a Downs child well/would you be prepared to terminate the pregnancy, etc etc. All heartbreaking questions.
As for only children - like you, we wanted another one but didn't get it, but were just SO grateful we got the one we did! I've been very conscious of the 'only is lonely' possibility, so right from the start I've been very keen on socialisation, from mums-n-babies coffee mornings onwards. It's vital that they know how to make and keep friends.
Holidays are tricky, in that it can become essential that you always choose somewhere with a good kids club, as obviously you can't rely on siblings entertaining each other. That said, I know a couple with twin boys, and the boys seldom regard each other as 'playmates' because it's 'only my bro' etc - they still crave the company of 'real' playmates.
Sometimes my son sees his mates having (and giving!) a really hard time to/from their siblings - loads of stress and argument and tears etc etc - and is actually grateful he doesn't have any of that!
One other factor to take into account. It's something I discounted, as my own parents were post-40 and lived to a ripe old age. BUT, yes, our own chances of dying prematurely increase radically as we age (fifty is THE age for cancer stats to go astronomical - be warned!), plus, of course, other illnesses and health problems overall.
I think if you do want another child, check out the Downs stats (and any other age-related pregnancy risks), decide if you can live with the consequences if necessary, and then, if you can - go for it! But don't delay any longer. Large age gaps between children (born to any age parent) don't help make good sibling companionship, and there will already be nearly three years between them.
So if you want another kiddie, start right now. Tonight!
All the best, Julie.
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