I have been married for over 30 years to a successful business man. This has been generally a happy and close marriage apart from the times when I have suffered from bouts of quite bad depression, caused mainly through loneliness because I have moved so many times through his job and haven't been able to forge close friendships. I also don't work. When I get depressed he can't cope and rejects me and that makes my depression even worse. Several times throughout his career he has gone through tough times at work and I have always done my best to support him and to help him through it. In the good times he has acknowledged that he wouldn't have been able to do what he does without my support, which he knows I have willingly given although it has meant sacrificing my own career. He is going through another bad patch at work and I have tried to be there for him. However, because I have got nobody to share my problems with, it has now become too much for me and I can't help him any more unless he can give me some sort of support too. I have tried to explain this to him but he cannot understand it. Because the issues are directly affecting him and not me he doesn't appreciate that I too have been carrying this burden; the difference is he has me to share it with, I have nobody to share it with. It has now reached crisis point and he has accused me of being unsupportive and selfish. I know he is right but whenever I try to tell him how I feel all he can say is, "What about me?!". I know it is hard for him but I feel I have nothing left of myself to give him. He now wants to dump me because he can't cope with my 'demands'. I am very depressed because the marriage is ending and because it is not going to be easy to start again in my mid-fifties with no career and probably very little financial security. I do have a couple of friends I could probably talk to about this but I would never dream of it because I would feel I was being very disloyal to my husband who is basically a good man. Has anybody out there been in a similar situation? I would welcome any advice.
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Husband unable to reciprocate emotional support
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