Hi independent. No need to apologise. We have to get all these feeling out or we'd go mad. Of course it hurts that this person will have contact with your children. I feel that way too and mine are grown ups. I hate the fact that she's in contact with my grand-children too. It makes me feel the odd one out in the family unit. I've done nothing wrong but i'm the one who feels bad. Sound familiar?
But if you listen to people talking about their childhood it's not the expensive toys and stuff they remember, it's the good times they had. Be the one who has time for them, who reads them a bedtime story when they are young, and who teaches them true values as they grow older. If you can be the one who is there for them when they need you then that is something than neither social position or money can buy.
You are a good person who wants her children to have the best, and the best thing you can do for them is give them lots of love and support. If you believe in yourself and and let them grow up with memories of you as a happy, confident, strong person then you will have given them something priceless.
We are all here for you when you need to unload stuff, and we all need to do that sometimes. It's not selfish, it's survival. Good luck and feel free to PM me if you need to chat
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Jae
(You can only reach for the future by letting go of the past)
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