Mine's big and looks older than her 21 years. but still so much less mature than her 19 year old sister who knows just where she wants to go. mine is not self motivated yet, but it's a tough world out there so I feel it is my maternal duty to prod her and find out what she wants then help her to get it even if it seems like " hand holding" to others.I don't think in this day and age she can afford to just spend valuable years waiting for inspiration. Maybe then it will be too late. J.