elf
member
Reged: 17/03/2009
Posts: 100
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How are you doing Alison??
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maddy1
member
Reged: 18/09/2008
Posts: 5
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Hi I know exactly how your feeling, my husband of 25 years left me the week after we celebrated our silver wedding in rome. He is having an affair with a colleague 19 years younger than him and believes this is his last chance of happiness. Trouble is i thought we were happy. Its now 11 weeks since he left, he wants nothing to do with me and will only speak to kids on a weekend. I have been disguarded as his wife and the pain and feelings of total panic over what the future holds are hard to explain to anyone that hasn't been in this situation. One day at a time is what everyone says and it is just that. It doesn't matter what anyone says to you they can't make it easier for you but having a shoulder to cry on does help. Take care
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Ugly_Breny
member
Reged: 08/07/2009
Posts: 4
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Hi alisonmpg, I feel for you. I am still grieving after my relationship with the only man I have ever truly loved and wanted (didnt even love my ex husband that much!) ended suddenly too. Stay strong girl, Im with you all the way!
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Jualla
member
Reged: 01/08/2009
Posts: 2
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Hi Alison, I just registered today and felt I had to write to let you know that I am going through the same thing at this moment in time too. My boyfriend broke up me 5 days ago and I don't know whether I am coming or going. It's seems to come in waves where one minute I feel quite positive and then in a split second I'm a complete heap. One thing I have realised is that I have some really great friends who have been a tower of strength, but I still go home alone and that is when it hits the hardest.
So I just wanted you to know that I completely understand and am feeling it with you. I do believe that we will get there and become better and stronger women for it (someone told me that anyway so am trying to believe them!).
Take care Alison,
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WoodyM
member
Reged: 01/04/2009
Posts: 679
Loc: Cheshire
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WELCOME Alison.......hopefully you have been reading other posts and can see what support we all lend each other, plus fun. Glad to have you aboard........
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Karin55
member
Reged: 03/08/2009
Posts: 1
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I just wanted you to know that I know how you feel in many ways and to let you know it does get better. There are different stages you go through when a relationship breaks up and a very hard part is the acceptance that its over. You will keep remembering everything and like you said even the name of a place will bring back a memory when you were happy there with him or on a weekend away etc etc. That does fade..... Time is the only healer and that won't help you right now. Keep busy...you may not feel like going out at the weekend but try not to spend too much time on your own. Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself. Give yourself little treats. When the time is right clear away things from your home environment that remind you of him or were his. Its day by day. My relationship ended after 6 years. It felt so raw and so painful I honestly felt I could feel my heart in pain. I managed to work hard as it was the only time I wasn't 100% focused on him. However I often spent 20 minutes in the bathroom during the work day locked in a bathroom cuticle crying. It was awful. I spent a month overseas about 8 months afterwards just to go somewhere I had always wanted to go and had no memories of him. It was hard to begin with but it gave me some strength back. When you're ready fous on getting to know you, getting your confidence back and enjoying some time to yourself. This was so hard for me but once I came through I stopped being so scared of everything on my own. I don't want to go on too much but let me know if you want me to talk you through anything. Its a few years on now and I am very happy now and a different person in many ways but I remember that time so clearly and would not wish the pain on my worst enemy. take good care of yourself and believe...You are not pathetic in any way...best of luck.
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alisonmpg
member
Reged: 19/05/2009
Posts: 31
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Karin55 - just to ask if you got my pm? Not chasing for a response, simply wondering if I did it "right" (I'm a bit of a technophobe) and may have deleted by mistake!
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gumpenscot
member
Reged: 17/06/2009
Posts: 491
Loc: Germany
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First, welcome to Jualla. Sorry to hear about your situation - you're in the right place for support.
Alison - I can't add anything that hasn't already been said. Most of us have been through similar situations, some of us several times. Although it might not seem like it now, you'll come out all right in the end.
Stay strong
gumpenscot x
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