oldbird
member
Reged: 14/07/2008
Posts: 7
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My first go at this!
I have an 18 year old daughter who is v overweight! We all eat sensibly, but she buys extra food, secrets it away and binge eats in secret.
It's hard to get her to discuss this, especially as she lies about what she eats, continually denying the buying and eating of 'her extras'!
She has a v low self image and despite being told by us how beautiful she is (and she is) she still insists she is ugly.
I don't know what to do to help her.
Any advice?
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hampshiregirl
member
Reged: 22/06/2008
Posts: 36
Loc: Hampshire
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Hi Oldbird
I don't have this problem but I suspect trying to get her to talk about it or "admit" it will not change what she is doing and will possibly make her even more secretive. You could always try a touch of reverse psychology and make a fab cake every weekend for the family that everyone can eat together? From what you say it sounds like low self esteem which is so hard to deal with. Instead of concentrating on the food side why not quietly try to increase her activity levels by asking her to help you to tone up your sad old middleaged body!, go swimming or exercise
class or just a walk regularly together. Have you got any friends with a dog who could invent a temporary problem and so needs someone ( guess who!) to walk the dog for half an hour every couple of nights. I really feel for you and hope some of this might help.
Good luck
hampshiregirl xx
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emptynest
member
Reged: 10/11/2007
Posts: 486
Loc: South Wales
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Hi Oldbird
My son was also overweight and a worry. He was thin as a rake when he was about 7 or 8 but then we moved house and he couldn't go out as much to play and so got less exercise. The main problem though was eating too much and it was very difficult to deal with. You don't want to give them a complex about their weight but you want them to be healthy. You wouldn't believe the number of sweet wrappers that I found when I moved his bed one day.
Fortunately he is now 19 and has lost some of this weight although he is still overweight. He has started riding a bike to work and back and this has helped. Exercise is the only answer I think - if you can encourage your daughter to do swimming regularly then she will lose the weight gradually.
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oldbird
member
Reged: 14/07/2008
Posts: 7
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Hi Hampshiregirl and emptynest,
Thanks for the advice. It's nice to know that I'm not thought of as an aweful Mum.
It's a real worry.
The self esteem is the biggest problem and if we could sort that out I think the weight would begin to sort itself out.
Like you son, emptynest, we moved just a she was due to begin year 8, and that's when it all seemed to begin.
The lack of excersise is a big problem too.
Again, thanks for the replies. it's nice to know there are people out there.
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Sonata
member
Reged: 21/12/2006
Posts: 274
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Why is she comfort eating? Perhaps you could go for a girlie night out or a meal somewhere.Perhaps a pamper day at a Health Farm and have a heart to heart.Maybe she wants to confide in you but doesn't know where to start.
Slimming World clubs have programmes for teenagers too and the meetings are good fun . Do you need to lose a few pounds ? If so ,you could go together.How about you both do an exersise class together at your local gym or sports centre. Or set a time each evening for a brisk walk?
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