| issi |
| (member) |
| 10/08/2008 11:53 |
FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Time to start a new opening line. The previous one managed to get quite a few people started and it is lovely to see people have a go, even if they have not done anything like this before. One opening line and other follow with around 100 words from their imagination. As I did the last one I think someone else may wish to start the next one. Anyone can have a go. If we have several then maybe we all pick up on the first one chosen. Over to you.
| Brenda1948 |
| (member) |
| 10/08/2008 14:05 |
Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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How about:
She opened the letter with trembling hands ....
| Loo |
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| 10/08/2008 17:16 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands .... she received a lot of mail since moving to this house. It was fresh start in a new home. It was a pity her daughter lived in New Zealand.
However, she still got letters for the previous owner. He appeared to have been in debt. The bank was making threats. She was nervous. She opened the letter. But the solicitor wrote that her daughter had lost her new address and had been unable to contact her. She read on. It said she was now a grandmother, to an adorable baby girl. Oh, she would ring her staight away.
Loo
| Sella_Vee |
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| 10/08/2008 17:21 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Wow, has a week gone by already? I haven't even done the last one yet. Thanks for getting us going, issi, Brenda and Loo.
| Ginnie |
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| 10/08/2008 19:07 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands desperately hoping she would get the result she wanted.
It had beenher first invitation to the mobile unit and she hadn't been unduly worried. Then came the first letter and she had been told that because of a technical fault she had to go for another examination.
She had stayed positive, not worried until she saw the envelope.
Her face felt hot, her heart was pounding - she pulled out the piece of paper; she read the words
"mammograms clear - review in three years"
Ginnie
| Jane_2009 |
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| 11/08/2008 00:51 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands...Sally knew the letter could mean the end of her marriage if Gerry ever found out the truth. She carefully pulled the letter out of the envelope and slowly opened it. She was glad Gerry was not at home so she could read the letter in peace. Sally felt a wave of nausea come over her as she opened the single piece of white paper she knew could change their lives forever.
She didn’t want her life to change. Gerry was kind, generous and a good father to Daisy. She was finally happy! What on earth would she do if she didn’t get the test results she wanted, she wondered...
Sally looked down and stared at the words on the page in disbelief!
The DNA test revealed a probability of paternity of just 14%!
Sally felt sad as she gazed into Daisy's beautiful blue eyes as she sat in the high chair. There was only one way out of this terrible situation, and it was going to be the hardest decision she had ever made ...
| cupcake |
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| 11/08/2008 11:14 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands.
-Oh, please, please don't let it be another rejection slip.
She had sweated blood and tears whilst writing this book and it would break her heart if it was rejected again.
Her story was so sad, heartbreaking really and she needed to tell it. She had suffered so much and putting it down in words had helped her to come to terms with her loss. She wanted others to benefit from her experience.
Slowly she pulled the paper from the envelope....
The sun shone through the window and fell in a pool at her feet, the birds sang their joyous melody in the garden.
She read the brief note...
| issi |
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| 11/08/2008 11:42 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands. She could feel the sweat pouring down her back. A light mustache of perspiration glistened above her swollen lip. Her feet were beginning to ache in the confines of her 5-inch stilleto shoes. A sea of faces stared at her, unable to move in anticipation. If botox had a smell then the room would have to be evacuated. The envelope was gold, the paper was white. She spoke: "And the winner is ...."
| honeybun |
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| 11/08/2008 17:19 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands. Tobias Publishing elegantly embossed on the envelope. Never in her whole life had Amy wanted something so passionately. Her mind raced, scrambled with longing, her body ached, with emotionally fatigue. It had been two years 3 months and four days of endless research, writing, and editing. Days had drifted into sleepless nights. Several times self-doubt had engulfed her soul. “ What a waste of time. What am I doing?” Amy would taunt herself, but doggedly she continued. Finally it was finished, she’d done it, her first novel.
“ Mum……….Please… can you read it…
| Brenda1948 |
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| 11/08/2008 19:37 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands. "Please, please, let me have got the job".
Six long months ago, Michael had left. At first, she had been numb with grief, but the realisation that he had left behind nothing but debts turned grief to anger, and then despair.
They'd lived together for ten years, but weren't married. "We don't need a piece of paper" he used to say. He'd married his new love, though, just before they moved to Australia.
If she didn't get a job soon, they would repossess the house. The BMW had already gone. Her hand shook.
| issi |
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| 11/08/2008 22:33 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands. Eighty-nine years of life were in those hands. A young girl; a young woman in love; a bride; a wife; a mother; a widow; all played out in public. A life lived slowly; almost over, in such a short time. There were no short cuts. Each part had to be played out to the full. And then, the letter, beautiful to look at, hard to read. But, as the mist cleared she could see there was no getting away from it. Once she was a star. For many years she had lived as a recluse. But still there people who would not forget. They wanted her story, and they wanted it now. She looked into the distance ... she was ready ....
| wendieg |
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| 15/08/2008 14:33 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands, the photographs falling to the floor. Although the evidence had been staring her in the face for months she still couldn’t bring herself to believe it was true. Hiring a firm of private detectives had been the only way to put her mind at rest but now, she wasn’t sure she really wanted to know. As she read the letter Emma felt a hammer blow to her soul. She reached for the wall and sank down. She glanced at the floor and through the blur of tears saw her husband’s ultimate betrayal.
| Jane_2009 |
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| 15/08/2008 15:08 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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OMG!
I've just re-read my very own contribution to this thread which I posted very late at night after I'd had one too many nightcaps!! Cringe!! And what a load of c**p!! 
I thoroughly enjoyed reading all the other contributions to this thread though!! What a great idea!!
| Brenda1948 |
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| 15/08/2008 21:18 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Does anybody feel up to commenting on any of the entries? Constructive criticism is always useful, and critically appraising other people's work could help us with our own writing.
I promise I won't be offended by criticism of my efforts.
I've started another thread asking for a new topic for this week, too.
| Chatelaine |
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| 16/08/2008 11:58 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands. Two sheets of prettily discreet cream coloured paper fluttered from the matching envelope and came to rest on her lap. The woman's handwriting inspired a confidence in her, which she had not felt before, and she started to read.
Totally stunned she leaned back in her chair, whilst continuing to stare at the letter.... It no longer was a letter from an enemy, but the letter from an ally. Another victim of his lies and deceit, just like she had been! Resolutely she reached for the telephone and started to dial....
| Chatelaine |
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| 16/08/2008 12:09 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Hi Brenda, I have been very little on the forum the last few weeks or so, and have not come across your name. Welcome!!!
Lovely to see that these For Writers threads have not died a death!!
I think constructive criticism would be very useful!! As long as it is done in the nicest and most well meant manner. For a number of years I was mentored (does this word exist??? if not, now it does
) by a well known Dutch writer, and she was a darling, and a wonderful inspiration. And yes, she criticised my work, but in the most kind and constructive manner. Sadly she passed away nearing 3yrs ago..... But somehow I feel that she knows that she is in my heart and my thoughts, and I hope that I will be able to dedicate a book or more to her one day. So often she comes to mind, and then I see her kind eyes, and that loving encouraging smile..... I hope to do her proud one day!
| gigi |
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| 17/08/2008 05:13 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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She opened the letter with trembling hands and removed the folded blue sheets of lined paper from inside the envelope. The trembling had become a numbness as Aliah reached for the chair and slumped into it. Her breath shallow, throat burning and jaw tight, she couldn't stop the flow of tears that had been held back for so long. Aliah looked down at the now crumpled paper on her lap. "Why now, why now?" she groaned softly to herself. Gradually controlling her breathing, easing it back to normal, the numbness of shock now leaving her, she was able to lift the papers and began to read.
| issi |
| (member) |
| 17/08/2008 08:25 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Hi Brenda. I agree some constructive criticism would give an edge to the writings. Perhaps a comment or two before someone puts in their contribution? Not mandatory of course, otherwise people will not want to join in.
| Ashbee |
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| 21/08/2008 21:34 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Just wanted to say that I've been catching up with all the FOR WRITERS posts and I am impressed at the stuff you've been writing. Such imagination and skill - simply brilliant. I am full of admiration and look forward to reading more...
| Jane_2009 |
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| 22/08/2008 15:11 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Ashbee, did you like mine? It was written after a few bevies! LOL
| Sella_Vee |
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| 22/08/2008 15:37 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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Great to see you back, Ashbee.
| Ashbee |
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| 22/08/2008 18:02 |
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Re: FOR WRITERS - A NEW OPENING LINE
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I liked them all, Jane2008, yours included particularly as I actually want to know more about your characters. How did the problem come about, why was it being confirmed now and what will she do about it...
I'm tempted to challenge you all to write another 100 words to add to either the start of your pieces or to follow on ... I want to know more!
And, Sella_Vee, thank you.