(member)

06/01/2009 20:45

Time to give something back?

Hello all
I am a newbie so hope you will be gentle with me. I'd like to share a little of what has happened over the last year and bounce a few ideas around. Here goes!! My youngest son has had type 1 diabetes since he was 10 we have absorbed it into our lives and he is of the get on with it school of thought and has taken it by the throat and given it a good shake. At secondary school he was mercilessly bullied not by the pupils but by the staff who literally made his life a misery because of his diabetes, not allowing him to eat when needed or test his bloods or provide work if he was off sick. At one point he was told his diabetes was in his head and he was attention seeking. We took his school to a disability tribunal and won, removed him and had him taught at a hospital school for a day and a half a week and god love him he came away with 9 GCSE's. He now has an engineering apprenticeship a lovely girl and life is good. During all this he suffered with dreadful depression and was under a psychiatric team and though he is better I can still see the scars he is nervous in crowds reticent to make new friends etc. Just before Christmas I lost my Mum adn it all came crashing down. new year's day I was a mess took myself off had a good cry and a severe talking too and decided up was the only way.
today a strange thing happened and an opportunity I never expected came my way to help in a fundraising push for diabetes UK, it means being high profile in a local way and organising collection points etc. But the big but is am I too scared to give it a go...its so outside my comfort zone. Do you think it will be a good focus after such a terrible year or do you think that I might be biting off more than I am up to chewing. I would like to give something back as they supported us so much through the dark days of the tribunal. Would you be generous enough to give me some advice please?

(member)

06/01/2009 20:50

Re: Time to give something back?

Dear Gloriosa - how brave of you and your son through such a terrible time. Go on, be brave again and give it a go, you never know what you can achieve until you try. Huge good luck to you. Pidge

(member)

06/01/2009 20:53

Re: Time to give something back?

Hi gloriosa an welcome to the forum.

I read your post with interest. It was wonderful to read about your son battling through and now a confident young man with a great future ahead of him.

I am so sorry to read about your mum, lots of us on the forum (myself included) have lot our mums, so we know exactly how you are feeling. Regarding helping in the fund raising push, only you know whether you are ready for it. If you are, go for it 100%. If you don't feel ready, don't beat yourself up, you are still mourning your mother. Perhaps you could still contribute but not in such a high profile position. I can understand you want to give something back, just be sure it is not too great a cost.

Keep checking the forum, you will have lots of advice from a lot of really wise women. Whatever you decide, make sure it is the decision for your sake only.

Foxie

(member)

06/01/2009 20:54

Re: Time to give something back?

Hello, you've come to the right place for support, there is always someone to talk to here, and lots and lots of advice. On reading your post and all you've been through its no wonder you've lost confidence, however, look at what you have achieved!!! You can do whatver you want to do, I'm sure a strong lady like you once she gets going can drum up some supporters. So go for it, and the very best of luck.

(member)

06/01/2009 21:01

Re: Time to give something back?

Welcome Gloriosa.
Is this a paid or voluntary position? A one off opportunity or something you might be able to do later on? I would probably say go for it but assuming that you lost your mum just before this Christmas I would also suggest you take some time to think about where you are in the grieving process - only you really know the answer to that one. Throwing yourself in to a new challenge is often a very positive thing to do, and if it is a paid position then maybe not something that will come your way again in a hurry. Sometimes things happen for a reason. Go with your instinct and good luck!

(member)

06/01/2009 21:05

Re: Time to give something back?

Hello m'dear and welcome! The ladies here have a width of experience and wise advice that is unsurpassed anywhere else.

It's incredible that your son was let down by the teaching staff but well done for winning your case against them. And I am sorry to hear about your mum ... I can understand why you are feeling daunted by the opportunity to take up this offer...at another time perhaps you would have snapped it up without a second thought but in such an early stage of grief it's understandable that you are hesitant. Grief is a funny thing - sometimes it helps to have another focus, sometimes you really have to do the mourning before you can move on. Only you will know which is right for you. If you really don't feel now is the right time, don't feel bad - you wouldn't want to do the work half-heartedly and maybe another opportunity will crop up in the future. But on the other hand, maybe you need this challenge?

Whatever you decide, I hope it all goes well with you and your son...

(member)

06/01/2009 21:07

Re: Time to give something back?

Thank you all for your generosity to a complete stranger. The post is unpaid and is to organise locally the Diabetes Uk 75th Anniversary Old jewellery appeal. Liasing with local media, arranging collection points, tapping up friends fro their broekn unwanted stuff and then posting to HQ in london where it will be recycled to raise cash for research. The idea appeals greatly and I thinks its a lovely idea to make use of the odd earings, broken chains that we all have in our jewellery boxes for such a good cause. Its just the lack of confidence it feels as though most things I touch lately turn to dust and I woul hate that to happen with this its too important to me to mess it up.

(member)

06/01/2009 21:14

Re: Time to give something back?

Gloriosa,Firstly i would like to say welcome to the Forum.

I feel its very early days unless you are truly ready to take on such a task.Oneday i am sure youll wake up,pull the cutains and think today is the day...

(member)

06/01/2009 21:24

Re: Time to give something back?

Gliorosa,

I am so sorry to hear about the recent death of your mum. I think you need to tread carefully at this time and not take on too much. I am sure that you will have opportunities in the future to do more...for the time being just take care of you and yours.

(member)

06/01/2009 21:30

Re: Time to give something back?

A big welcome to the forum Gloriosa, hope we will see plenty of you.

(member)

06/01/2009 21:49

Re: Time to give something back?

Hi Gloriosa and welcome from me too.

What a lot of great advice the ladies have given, there's nothing more that I can add. Perhaps this opportunity will give you a focus, but only you will know if the time is right for you.

What a fantastic young man your son sounds!

Wishing you well and looking forward to getting to know you more.

(member)

06/01/2009 21:56

Re: Time to give something back?

Hi Gloriosa,

Sorry to hear about the recent death of your Mum.

I agree with Foxie and the others who say that it may be too soon to throw yourself into something like this. But you will know best yourself.

You are obviously a fighter and deserve enormous credit for standing by your son the way you did. Hats off!

ShelBee

(member)

06/01/2009 22:11

Re: Time to give something back?

Hi Gloriosa,and welcome to the forum.
I applaud you wanting to do this,but think I agree with Sweet Pea. Go with your instinct.

(member)

06/01/2009 22:13

Re: Time to give something back?

Gloriosa welcome!
take this on and do it because you can and because you are a lady with a huge understanding of the issues from first hand experience and you must have tremendous strength and determination shown by the fact that you were willing to take on the local education system, challenge poor and ignorant treatment and come out on top for your son.
Your Mum will be even more peoud of you if she can see from above what you are about to take on.
I am delighted your son has shone through despite everything. I am sure his experiences and his diabetes have left their scars on him but on the other hand they have also shaped him into the person that he is and like you despite everyhting he shone through with a triumphant 9GCSE's - he has a long way to go and very good luck to him - thank heavens for people like you!

(member)

06/01/2009 22:23

Re: Time to give something back?

Welocme to the forum Gloriosa,

condolensces on your loss draw strength from your memories-

I say go for it, it will change your life for the better. Go with your instincts, they won't let you down - listen to that inner voice.

Whatever you decide good luck.

BQ x

(member)

06/01/2009 22:27

Re: Time to give something back?

Welcome gloriosa,
What have you got to lose. We have another forumer, Duffy, who I think educates people about diabetes.

(member)

07/01/2009 00:36

Re: Time to give something back?

Welcome Gloriosa,

Well done in all you have done for your Son and welcome to the forum. I think the ladies on hear have given excellent advice and i have nothing extra to add.

Take your time and think carefully whether you feel you are ready and that you are up to it as specially so soon after loosing your Mum.

Good Luck in your decision. Tinkerbelle.

(member)

07/01/2009 08:07

Re: Time to give something back?

A very warm welcome from me too. Is there any possibility that you could share the job with another person? It always seems less daunting if there are two of you .....do what you feel you are able to without feeling guilty about what you are not ready to face. But dont let fear or lack of confidence get in the way. It sounds as if it appeals to you but you are nervous, which is very very natural. At the end of the day only you can decide. Good Luck with what you do and Well done you for getting your son through all the problems... I hope everything works out well for him from now on
xx

(member)

07/01/2009 08:30

Re: Time to give something back?

Hi and welcome Gloriosa.

From your initial summary of the situation, you come across as an intelligent, literate woman and my feeling is that yes you could do the job, it's only self-doubt that is holding you back. When I want to do something but am feeling out of my depth, I break it down and daft as it might seem, i pick up the phone and say 'yes' to whatever and don't think about the consequences. I f I do think I dither and talk my self out of it.

Splash has come up with a good idea about being able to split the job with someone else if you think that would help.

As for your Mum passing away, well all I can say is that when mine passed away, I spen 2 weeks felling miserable and then like you gave myself a good talking to and got on with things. It was the right approach for me, but not for eveyone. If it is the right way for you, I guess you would have made your mum very proud.

Good luck

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