Hello suejane, I went through a similar time a few years ago. I just looked after myself, gentle exercise, facials/pedicures/manicures, mostly at home,( I didn't want anyone to influence the changes my thought process was going through and the confidence I was gaining) though I found a hairdresser who was prepared to work with me, style and blow dry my hair before anything was cut and only went ahead when we both knew exactly what I wanted.

I found a very good coffee shop where I felt comfortable to go alone, relax and read a newspaper. My big fear was that I would look like "mutton dressed as lamb" so I looked at what elegant older women in mags wore. Bit by bit I found my own style, tried on different styles of clothes and when I felt confident stocked them until I had enough to make a wardrobe change and built on that. Then it just all seemed to fall into place, I was different but still in my comfort zone.

Best wishes for your progress with the counselling.