Can you make time for just you and him? If you're both working and trying to look after home and family then you do forget how to be a couple. Taking a couple of hours out of your routine where you can talk about anything and everything other than the baby, the housework and the bills might really help remind you both how much you mean to each other as a couple. Also have you talked to him about how you feel and how you want things to be back to where they once were? It may be he's equally worried afterall you've both been through a lot in a short time. (The early menopause may be contributing to your nto feeling sexy - see if you can get medical advice on that too).