Don't have the affair.

You say you love your husband so be honest with him. How do you know it will go in one ear and out the other? Don't you think he might be unhappy too but maybe avoiding facing up to the issue? There are ways of saying that you'd love your sex life together to be better without making it a personal criticism of him. If you tell him honestly how you strongly you feel he may well realise that things have to change. Maybe a little bit upsetting but far better than going behind his back.

I'm not staying people should be condemned to stay for ever in an unhappy marriage so be honest, take time to try to sort out the problem and if eventually you feel it's just not going to work you can move on knowing you behaved decently towards a man who you say you love and describe as a great dad.

It's not a nice situation to be in; I hope it works out for you both and your little daughter

Mags