I've got a friend in a similar position except he is violent. I've never told her to leave him because she's never asked the question. The last time he hit was on Saturday and this time she has moved out - the reason was because her daughter told her enough was enough - she's fourteen and she is fed up with all the lying and the secrecy, covering up for her Dad etc. One thing my friend has always done was to be in charge of the finances, although the house is in joint names. She knows that it will be a matter of time before he's arrested and put in jail because Saturday he hit a policeman. She doesn't want this to happen but I think it is slowly dawning on her that HE is responsible for HIS behaviour and all the love that she lavishes on this guy is never going to turn him away from the alcohol. Your friend and mine have got realise that alcoholism is not something they will ever control and when she says she wants their life back what exactly does she want, because if it was the life she led before she found out about it then that life was a lie. Is that really what she wants?

One things for sure I do so appreciate my old man - I am one of the lucky ones and I hope I never slip up and take this for granted.