Hi independent. You have said something that really resounds. You feel 'negative' about your situation. I don't know how others can get past this but I have learned that thinking in 'negative' terms attracts more negativity. Conversely, thinking positively will attract more positive things towards you. It is a slow process. You really have to find the good things in the new situation and focus less on the things that make you feel bad. Jae's advice is so true and is part of the positive side of things that you now so clearly need to build on.