I cant advise you to stay or leave...........

But your nest is empty, can you not find something in your life that is yours to give you power?

My husband and I went through a bad patch, bereavement money worries etc etc and I thought is this it then?

Speaking as someone who has been there I would say find something of your own.

You say he is a lovely man,,,,,,, why not go on holiday or for a long weekend with this lovely man?