Hi Kim, my dad died 1st July, 2004, it was the day after my birthday,my brother and I sat with him all night on the night of my birthday and he died the following day at 4.15 in the afternoon I sat by his bed the whole day holding his hand. He had been ill for 6months with lung cancer, and was very ill in the end but he had lived until he was 90. You on the other hand have had to take in his illness and then his death all in a short period of time, you never had a chance to get used to his illness, but remember you were with him all the time he didn't die alone you done your upmost best for him. You will get over it but as with everything time is a great healer.Just remember the good times and if you need to cry then cry I always say don't bottle these things up get it out. Thinking of you, Denzy x