Sometimes I think we have to be careful what we wish for or think twice about what it is we think we want. When I married the first time I always wanted 4 children, but when my only child was 3 my husband left. I then met my second husband who said he only ever wanted 1 child but ended up with 3. When we married he had his 1 (on a day to day basis)he later adopted my daughter (who has remained my only child) and every other weekend I got my extra 3, and the trouble that has brought into my life. We just have to enjoy what we have is what I think lulubells. I hope you will be able to resolve things for yourself so that you can be happy and enjoy your girls.