kate1
member
Reged: 18/08/2008
Posts: 2798
Loc: Leicestershire
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Are you happy in your marriage or do you just stay out of habit or the lack of courage to get out of it?
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MangeTout
member
Reged: 08/07/2007
Posts: 4042
Loc: Oxfordshire
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I'm not married but if I got the stage where I was unhappy with my OH, or he with me, I hope I'd have the courage to go.
I think many people stay together but wish they could part. It must be very hard, especially if you have children to consider. I don't know what I'd do in those circumstances.
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Please sponsor me for the Ribbon Walk 2009 at http://www.justgiving.com/mangetout
Thank you
 
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Snowy1066
member
Reged: 08/07/2008
Posts: 4061
Loc: Southeast
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We've had some ups and downs (none becos of other woman or men for that matter), but on the whole I have had a great marriage, he still makes me laugh, and for 61 he's not bad!
He keeps fit and is still slim, which is more than can be said for me!!
He's kept me in the manner to which I became accustomed, and the drinks cabinet is always full, what more can a woman ask?
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kate55
member
Reged: 06/04/2008
Posts: 86
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I often used to ask myself this question then my OH had very unexpected heart attack (luckily he is now ok) and it answered my question I was devastated I think we can all take people and things for granted and forget how great they are and then something reminds us so the answers is YES I am very happy and I hope I never take it for granted again
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buckup
member
Reged: 08/04/2008
Posts: 77
Loc: whitstable Kent
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Thought I was!! Stayed married for 28 yrs then alone came someone else who made me realise I really wasn't !! So I left!(Actually it's not as easy as it sounds but this forum isn't long enough to go into it all) so Happily with new man. LOL
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issi
member
Reged: 30/09/2007
Posts: 3277
Loc: Surrey
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Why just habit and lack of courage as reasons for staying in an unhappy marriage Kate? There must be lots of reasons that people stay together - maybe they are not unhappy all the time, maybe they have families to consider where splitting up would be too awful, maybe they hope for change in the future. Just a few thoughts to put out there.
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rotschopf
member
Reged: 17/04/2008
Posts: 36
Loc: Germany
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Blissfully so in second marriage! my husband is my lover and my best friend, what more can a girl ask?
Rotschopf
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blossom97
member
Reged: 02/02/2008
Posts: 2419
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I am really happy in my marriage, been together 12 years and he is my soul mate!
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Snowy1066
member
Reged: 08/07/2008
Posts: 4061
Loc: Southeast
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Good answer Kate55.
After our troubled times of a few years ago, I think our marriage is stronger, even tho it was really tough, and I felt like packing my bags at times. We both got thru it and now we have a really good relationship.
He does his thing and I do mine!!
No only kidding.
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rosettastone
member
Reged: 11/03/2008
Posts: 523
Loc: Kent/Surrey borders
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very happy, just celebrated 25 years together. 
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carpe diem - seize the day!
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cherryblossom
member
Reged: 14/08/2008
Posts: 142
Loc: central scotland
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2nd marriage, married for 5 years been together nearly 7, very happy, hes my best friend, makes me laugh, makes me feel secure and wanted and is great with my children, so a very big YESSSSSSSS is my answer
Cherryblossom
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cherryblossom
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annemari
member
Reged: 07/03/2008
Posts: 2561
Loc: Gloucestershire.
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Uneventful as my life has been but with one marriage lasting only three years,then 1 jilt,(not by me),followed by another encounter who wanted to get engaged to me, but,unknown to me, seeing and (how green was I!)living with somebody else,then finally a disastrous marriage resulting in a 2nd divorce!!!!
Please forgive me for being hesitant in wanting to be with anybody ever again,let alone get married.
But, I AM!! and I love him to pieces.
It took OH eight years to persuade me and this year we will have been married for ten years. 
Poor OH had to go through a couple of years of me self-doubting that the marriage would last,but it has,and I love him so much I could burst. 
I mean,how could you not love somebody who insists that you have breakfast in bed,and goes up the garden every morning espeicially to pick fresh raspberries to go on my Weetabix.
Definitely 3rd time lucky.
Annemari
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Annemari xx
 "Hey Tinker,Mums a proud and bouncy TwiddleTigger"!! "Eric,Have you seen Mum's pinny?"
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stellac
member
Reged: 14/05/2008
Posts: 907
Loc: mauritius
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To be honest i don't know. I have been married for 34 years and sometimes there have been very dark moments but i get to live in a place i adore i am surrounded by people who i like and work with animals. I have to confess OH is only part of the package he has been away for 3 weeks and we have spoken about 4 times briefly, when he gets back next week we will slip back into the usual routine well worn slippers.
Stella
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chris_in_france
member
Reged: 28/07/2008
Posts: 53
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I am like stellac at times I am not sure , we have been together through a seriously ill child when I got cancer and various other tribulations but at times he drives me completely up the wall and I think I cant stand this anymore . I think our biggest problem is that we spend too much time together , because we are both retired in our 50s we seem to get in each others way a lot of the time . But anyway life is not perfect and when we are getting on well we have a laugh .
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PLASMO
member
Reged: 13/03/2008
Posts: 4786
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Hi Kate1,
Yes, I am happy in my marriage. MOH is the total opposite to me, I am extrovert, and he is really introvert, but after 43 years together we seem to know what button to press, and keep each other content. We have had our problems but they have never festered, and really werent that serious.
MOH is always content, he loves his home, is happy with his family (meaning MS and I) enjoys his wine, loves good food, can be a little complacent at times which makes me cross, but we get on really well together, and love each other.
Someone asked me the other day in the hairdressers, if you could live your life over again, would you still marry the same person - and my answer was a loud, definite- YES.
Plasmo x
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Ashbee
member
Reged: 13/06/2008
Posts: 1123
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Yep, very happy. I waited a long time alone before he came along so I've have experience of an unhappy marriage (sheer misery) and 20 years living alone. For the first time in my life I have unconditional love and financial and emotional security - all thanks to this lovely man. I wish I was a better partner to him though...I have my gremlins which he dismisses as nothing much. Bless him!
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kazann
member
Reged: 04/07/2008
Posts: 156
Loc: Derbyshire
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After 30 years of Marriage I would'nt change a thing like any marriage we have our ups and downs but he's a brilliant dad and he makes me feel safe and secure and loves me for what I am.
My brother's wife left and took their 4 year old son with her she went to live in Australia he'd say life's a bitch then you die. However he did re marry but would'nt have anymore children.
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Chelsea
member
Reged: 06/02/2008
Posts: 943
Loc: Essex
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Normally, I would say "yes" but feeling a bit fed up today as I went to meet my FF room-mate at Bluewater yesterday, skipped my favourite sport (window shopping) so that I could buy something to cook for dinner and get back in time to prepare it.
Got stuck on the motorway for 2 and half hours, got back at 9.20 pm. Did anyone ring to see if I was OK? Did anyone think to make the bed up with the clean sheets that were ready to put on? Did anyone think I might be hungry when I got in? No, all H had to say was "Don't worry about dinner, Son got himself a takeaway and I'm not hungry" his idea of thoughtfulness!
Still sore about it this morning, but H can't see the problem. Grrrrr! 
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Chelsea x
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nowcemsi
member
Reged: 24/06/2008
Posts: 273
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Had this question been asked of me 5 years ago I would have put a resounding NO
However, one never knows what lies around the corner.
After having a rather difficult 20 or so years with himself basically due to pressures of life, bad luck etc
I feel very ill in March of this year ... and the marriage has taken a turnround. He lost his job I became housebound various tragedies happened ... and suddenly I look around and there he is my support network, cooking for me, getting me little treats taking me out for little drives a wall I can lean on, that doesnt fall over
so yes I am happy in my marrige because there are bad and good times and we appear to be getting through it!
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Onceshy
member
Reged: 10/08/2008
Posts: 271
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A resounding yes from me. We met through Dateline 17 years ago after each had disatrous relationships and were persuaded to join by friends. Although sceptical it worked for us. We're soulmates and have 2 brilliant boys. We have our spats though and at times it's tough going but once we rekindle the magic it's great. My only wish would be more time together alone to recharge the batteries and discover each other again without the stresses of home, kids, taxing etc> Does that sound selfish?
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