Burdie
member
Reged: 10/11/2007
Posts: 36
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Well its two months now since we moved mum into a home. Yesterday was the first time she didn't cry to come home during the visit. I think the depression pills are helping, although I didn't notice her being slower or more vague. When I arrive she was packing up to come home, pictures off walls, empty drawers etc. but thats a daily routine! We had a custard tart in the garden, then a visit from a lady with a labrador who brings it in to visit every Tuesday,(from 'Dogs for the Disabled') then painted her nails. All in all not too bad, until leaving time, just before her lunch.
Said she would see me to the door then wispered she was coming home when they were not looking. Just when I thought I was getting somewhere! she got upset when the carer led her away I think he had a tough time too!
Apparently she daily tries the combination door lock to see if it will open. I have now realised she is becoming brighter in the home, they are continuing to let her have the Alhzeimer pills to delay the illness because she still benifits from them.
Now I am begining to think we should have struggled on a bit longer, although on bad days at home she wouldn't get up at all, so maybe she is in the best place.
Burdie
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HeadGirl
member
Reged: 11/01/2008
Posts: 1848
Loc: Maidstone, Kent, England
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It sounds as though she is, Burdie. It will take time, so don't fret yourself.
I know nothing about this, but have been reading your posts and it seems that things are getting better, albeit slowly. Give it another two months and see how things are then. I understand that it must be tough for you, though, so keep posting and let us "bolster" you up.
Big hugs.
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debenjane
member
Reged: 11/01/2008
Posts: 554
Loc: suffolk
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I can only imagine how hard it is to see your beloved mum as she is. I do think she is in the right place and you are lucky to get so much help from the staff. Life can seem so cruel sometimes. Do keep us posted, I hate it when I am following progress on a thread and then am left wondering. We're all here for you, don't forget.
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brandyqueen
member
Reged: 01/04/2008
Posts: 649
Loc: essex
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hang in there burdie, your mum is in the best place , visit as often as you can, they will look after her, and what ever you do don't feel guilty. you have done your best. my thoughts are with you, this is such a difficult decision that you made, but your mum will be okay, its you who needs support and love, sending you a hug, take care. elaine.
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magwii
member
Reged: 28/03/2008
Posts: 334
Loc: North Cyprus
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Burdie, my heart goes out to you. I repeat brandyqueen's sentiments, DON'T feel guilty. She really is in the best place and sounds as though she is being well looked after. You made the right decision. I know how difficult it is for you and you will be in all our thoughts.
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PLASMO
member
Reged: 13/03/2008
Posts: 2071
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Burdie, I have no experience of this other than a friend of mine has two relatives suffering from this terrible decease. Her aunt and MIL are both in homes, and everytime she visits them she returns feeling so upset, and wishes there was more she could do for them both.
I think just being there for the people you love is the most important thing, and Im sure that they know this even though sometimes they cant let you know. I agree with debenjane, please let us know how your mother is. Plasmo xx
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Loo
member
Reged: 09/01/2008
Posts: 580
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Maybe your mother seams brighter because of all the little activities going on. Do they have something everyday, like the dog lady? There are other people there to interact with too. Sounds like you have got a good place for her there.
Best wishes
Loo
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....as in Looby Loo
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Duffy
member
Reged: 14/02/2008
Posts: 1274
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..thinking of you...keep us posted I do hope your mum continues to settle....Must be very hard for you to walk away each time you visit...Dont feel guilty..at least you are there for your mum..I see so many elderly people with families living miles away who dont care..dont visit...so sad!!...Stay strong...x
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